FAMILY REJECTION:::

I keep hearing more and more from girls all over the world about how their families reject them after they disclose their abuse. I have to say it is one of the sickest parts of incest. How a mother can reject her daughter and choose the abuser makes me want to lock those mothers up and throw away the key!  Your thoughts..... xxx dr. p

Parole Hearing

I just got back from Rhode Island from a parole hearing with a Girlthrive girl.  She was magnificent and I learned a lot. I learned that in the State of Rhode Island at a parole hearing for a sexual offender you are not limited in what you say. Many times in court before the abuser is locked up, you could be terrified, but now a couple of years later you have more courage, perhaps therapy and you can say what ever you want. Our girl let the parole board what a monster her abuser was. And they told her she was brave and strong and wonderful. THEY DENIED HIS PAROLE.!! Do any of you have experiences to share about court or parole or reporting your abuser? We would love to hear your experiences with this. xxx dr. p

Girlthrive Tee's

Girlthrive Inc. is partnering with a wonderful young fashion designer from Philadelphia to make our Girlthrive Tee's! Reese Juel has agreed to volunteer her time and energy to design our tee's!  These Tee's will be given to all scholarship girls, all donors, and sold on the site.

So far Nicki and I have come up with I AM A GIRLTHRIVE GIRL! and I HELPED A GIRL THRIVE!


So unleash your creative energy and send us your ideas! Blog us your ideas and let us know your age too! xo dr. p

Please Review Girlthrive Inc. on Great Non-Profits!

Girlthrive Inc. is growing and helping more and more girls every day. Please review Girlthrive on Great Non-Profits so that we can apply for more and more funding and help more and more girls! First click the link to our brochure and then please go to the link for Great Non-Profits and write a review . You are all a part of the Girlthrive community! Love xo dr. patti

http://www.girlthrive.com/donate/Brochure.pdf

http://greatnonprofits.org/reviews/girlthrive-inc/

Beautiful Post by Nicki!

my resolution- No longer living between my hat and my heels.

by Nicole Mckenzie on Thursday, October 28, 2010 at 12:55pm

Here I am thriving and surviving and I make a resolution that I will do what I must to help as many victims of abuse as possible.  No sooner than i make this resolution and i start to speak out...suddenly I begin to receive backlash from people who everyone would assume to be the last people to do such a thing.  One statement I heard that almost brought me to a very quick stop was "In your quest to help other people you are hurting alot of innocent people."  You know, I really had to stop and think about things and it became so clear that everyone is happiest when an incest survivor suffers in silence so that no one asks questions. 

My message to everyone is that, that is my point...people need to ask questions and stop leaving these girls and boys to suffer.  apparently no one remembers that I never asked to be abused nor did I ask to be separated from the people who truly loved me.  To all my abuse survivors it is never your fault...it is the abusers fault...Sadly, the truth is that many survivors are forced to into being victims of suffering in silence because when they speak out people ask questions.

WELL I HAVE NEWS FOR THE WOLRD.  PLEASE FEEL FREE TO ASK QUESTIONS, THAT IS THE ONLY WAY YOU WILL LEARN HOW TO IDENTIFY WHEN SOMEONE IS BEING ABUSED.  One of the things alot of people always say to me is that they couldn't tell I was being abused.  Truth is that not all sexual abuse victims are as obvious as depicted in "Precious".  Many of us, live between our hat our heels.

But here is my resolution to my resolution...I WILL NO LONGER LIVE BETWEEN MY HAT AND MY HEELS TO PLEASE ANYONE...

I WILL NOT KEEP SILENT....

I WILL OPEN PANDORA'S BOX (as keeping it closed keeps my hope hidden)...

I WILL DO WHAT IT TAKES TO HELP THOSE I LOVE AND THOSE I WILL COME TO LOVE...

I WILL VICTOURIOUSLY EMERGE THROUGH ALL MY TRIALS WITH GOD BY MY SIDE...

I WILL NOT ALLOW ANYONE TO TWIST GOD'S WORDS TO MAKE ME SILENT...

 WITH EVERY NEGATIVE WORD THAT IS SAID TO ME I WILL CREATE A WORD OF ENCOURAGEMENT FOR MYSELF, MY FELLOW SURVIVORS AND THOSE WHO TRULY ARE OUR SUPPORTERS....SO GET IT STRAIGHT, JUST LIKE JOB, THE MORE YOU FIGHT AGAINST ME THE MORE I FIGHT BACK, HUMANS CAN ONLY MAKE ME PAUSE BUT CAN'T STOP ME UNLESS ITS TO TAKE MY BREATH AWAY AND UNTIL GOD SAYS ITS OVER IT ISN'T OVER. 

I AM A SUBJECT NOT AN OBJECT AND I KNOW THAT NOW AND WILL NEVER FORGET IT.

PS...WHEN YOU FEEL DISCOURAGED DO WHAT I DO..EVEN IF I HAVE TO CRY WHILE I'M ENCOURAGING MYSELF I REMIND MYSELF THAT I'M THAT SAME GIRL THAT PRAYED AND CRIED NIGHT AFTER NIGHT AND DAY AFTER ... I AM A CONQUEROR AND NOTHING ANYONE SAYS CAN TAKE THAT AWAY....  I KNOW WHAT I WENT THROUGH AND I KNOW HOW I CAME THROUGH IT ....AND IF I CAN DO IT YOU BEST BELIEVE YOU CAN TOO...ITS A CONSTANT STRUGGLE BUT BELIEVE ME IT GETS BETTER WHEN YOU JUST STOP AND THINK ABOUT WHAT A WONDERFUL TEAM YOU HAVE EVEN IF ITS JUST YOU AND MY AWESOME GOD.

DO NOT LIVE BETWEEN YOUR HAT AND YOUR HEELS...PLEASE I IMPLORE YOU...STEP OUTSIDE THE CONFINES OF THAT DARK CLOSET...SEE WHEN YOU OPEN PANDORA'S BOX ALL YOUR TROUBLES FLOW OUT  BUT WITH THOSE TROUBLES, HOPE, JOY, HAPPINESS, THEY ARE ALSO RELEASED.

BE ENCOURAGED,

NICKY...striving with GIRLTHRIVE INC

Ways you love yourself!

Hey there fabulous gals!! Many of you are here on this blog because someone distorted "love" in a totally FU*^@#%ED UP way! Your father/brother/cousin/uncle/stepfather told you he "loved" you as he sexually abused you! You have had to learn to really love yourself.  Let's talk about the ways in which you now love yourselves.  It can be as simple as putting on a sweater when you are cold, or as sweet as treating yourself to a cupcake when you feel like having a sweet. Share the love!

How to Handle Triggers....

Hello wonderful gals! Sorry I have not put up a new blog in a while.... I have been busy maintaining "Invisible Girls" facebook page. But let's get back into the saddle with the blogs!

Okay, many girls talk about how hard it is sometimes when they get triggered and they don't quite know what to say or do.  You could be at a friends house and her brother may put his little sister or cousin on his lap- it could be totally innocent but you get triggered.... You could be at a movie and suddenly there is a scene that makes you get up and go to the rest room- you could be in class and someone taps you on the shoulder and you jump..... How do you handle triggers? What are some of your personal triggers?

Let's help each other with this- any ideas, solutions, success?!

xo dr. p